I Have a Date!

You know what I love about getting older?

I love watching my siblings growing up. I was on the phone with my stud-muffin little brother yesterday, and we were talking about his birthday (he's 17, can you believe it?) and other, more trivial matters. Mostly about food. Weird, but true.

See, I have this favorite burger place, but it's only in the Austin area in Texas, which means I almost never get to enjoy it, because I'm only home one or two weeks out of the year. BUT! Brian is coming home from his mission in April, and I'll be going home for that, so Mighty Fine and I will be having a delicious, sumptuous reunion.

But then! Ben told me that there was this other burger place that he likes even better. And, of course, the mean little blighter that he is, he started describing the burgers and fries in mouth-watering detail. I had just gotten off work and was waiting for the bus so that I could go home and make dinner. Hello, purest form of torture.

It suddenly occurred to me over the tidal-wave-style rumblings in my tummy that Ben and I should totally go on a sibling date to this superior burger place. And that's when I realized that I love that I'm getting older, because it means that Ben is old enough to drive us to the place and he and I can have a real, honest-to-goodness, one-on-one dinner (or lunch---burgers are acceptable for anytime except breakfast), just the two of us. I don't have to ferry him around anymore.

And I totally love that.

So yeah, I have a date. In two months. With my little brother. It's going to be awesome.

Oh, and I have a date next Saturday, too (not with my little brother). ^_^

Life's pretty great.

Big Little Brother

Forgive the ugly bird in the last post. But I felt sort of stupidly, buck-toothed, ugly-faced happy about my gigantic tax returns and needed a picture to match. Because taking an ugly one of myself wasn't an option. Also, I did not have any bills to throw in the air because all of my money is electronic at the moment.

So you got a really ugly-looking emu.

You're welcome.

So... Leap Day.

Try as I might, I really can't figure out how to celebrate it. Is it bad that I know exactly how to celebrate Hobbit Day, but not Leap Day? I even know how to celebrate Groundhog Day. The only thing I can think of is to briefly cheer that my younger brother is 16 and not 4 this year, since he was a mere 28ish hours away from being being born on the 29th.

Oh yeah, my stud-muffin brother is sixteen now. He's been breaking hearts for a few years, but now he can actually date those hearts before breaking them.

I kid. He's not a heartless player. But I have received an endless amount of entertainment from going home to visit and watching all the little 12 to 15-year-old girls swooning over him. I was that age once. I know what they're thinking. And it's hilarious. It's also extremely satisfying. I like knowing that girls think my brothers are cute. They'd darn well better, if they know what's good for them.

And Ben has a lot more going for him than just his looks (and he is the best looking one in our family---in my opinion, anyway (Dad, don't take it personally, okay?)). He's been able to carry a tune and hit every note pitch-perfect since he was a little guy who sang on the toilet while Brian and I laughed on the other side of the door. Sorry, that may be a little embarrassing for him, but he'd better get used to it. I may or may not be saving more of that story to tell his wife someday. Besides, it's in my Big Sister Contract to say at least one embarrassing thing about my little brother. Back on topic: He really does have an amazing voice, and it sounds even better now that it's dropped. He's also a champion snuggler, and treats me wonderfully, despite his very big "cool" factor.

He also puts High School Lynnae to shame when it comes to his grasp of the gospel. Every time I go to say goodnight when I'm visiting home, I always walk in on him saying his prayers or reading his scriptures. There was one night, after I'd come home to de-stress from a very difficult time at BYU, that I just stood in the doorway to his room and soaked up the sight of him on his knees, so grateful that he was such a good example.

I used to read about Nephi and Laman and Lemuel and worry that I had too much in common with Nephi's resentful older brothers, because the idea of one of my younger siblings ruling over me was just as repellent to me as it was to them. But seeing Ben on his knees like that, night after night, I've come to realize that I would be honored to allow my brothers to counsel and guide me. Brian already has. Ben probably will someday.

I often brag about how I have the best parents in the world. And it's true. But I also have the best brothers in the world (and sister, too). Both Ben and Brian have become more protective of me as they've outgrown me, and I often catch myself slipping and calling Brian my "big" brother, even though he's three years younger. When I was younger, I dreamed of having a big brother to take care of me, never realizing that my little brothers would grow into that role and happily fill those shoes. Thanks, Ben, for being my big little brother. You're awesome, and I'm the luckiest sister in the world.

Missed You!

Hi blog! Did you miss me? 'Cause I missed you. I really have been meaning to write, but then I got busy with the whole end-of-school thing.

Oh.

Yeah.

Did you catch that? End. Of. School! As in done! Finite! Terminado! Like, forever! No more tuition, classes, homework, or finals. Can you feel the relief? I certainly can.

So, to recap: my birthday was pretty darn awesome. I was sitting on the floor of the apartment playing Set with Stephanie and all of a sudden, Savannah and Aubry burst in through the door, threw a pink pillowcase over my head and started dragging me out the door. After being thrown in the car, they drove me to a park for my very own birthday barbecue. Complete with a Cookie Monster cake and a gilded leatherbound edition of The Hobbit (which is definitely the way to my heart--well done, Stephanie). I'm so ridiculously spoiled by my roommates.

I've still been a massive sicky, and my boss may or may not have less-than-favorable-feelings towards me right now, since I've missed so much work. (My old Nazi-boss from Fareway would have fired me long ago. Dude, like I can help it if I can't breathe). But! I'm finally doing better. Just in time for summer break. Go figure. My body tries to kill me during finals, and then realizes summer (and no more school--Forever!) is here and decides, "Hey! Let's party now!" Gee thanks. I could have used some of that health earlier. You know, like for beating the big bad boss, Finalculus. (You don't have to laugh. That was a lame one.)

My cousin had a couple of trauma-based brain abscesses that temporarily paralyzed him last week, which gave me quite a scare, I'll be honest. He's my age, and it happened because he had his wisdom teeth pulled (one more reason--as if I needed any--to leave my stupid teeth in there until they cause an actual problem, not some imaginary future one). He's almost fully recovered now, so my grandma and I drove up to Logan to see him yesterday.

One hair-raising drive through almost-zero-visibility-rain later, and I'm home now.

And it's Father's Day. ^_^ More on that later.

Sometimes I Suck as a Sister

Ah! I'm a sucky sister sometimes. Yesterday was Jessa's birthday, and I didn't even call her. I didn't realize it until today. She's 17. Holycrap. I feel so old (a feeling that wasn't helped by the discovery of a couple of strands of long silvery hair in my bangs yesterday morning--I'm too young to go grey!) I also failed to get Brian a letter before his P-day. That makes two weeks the poor boy has gone without getting a letter from me. Granted, I never promised to write him every single week, but it was kind of an unspoken expectation on both sides, I think. So now I feel bad.

Ohmygosh. My sister is seventeen. I remember turning seventeen! That was like, yesterday. Okay, so it was actually five years ago, but it feels so recent. I was seventeen when I started at BYU, in fact. Only for a couple of months, but I was.

I'm proud of my Jessa, though. She's come so far from the unsure, somewhat awkward little twelve-year-old that she was when I left for college. As Brian and I have both left the house, she's found the space she needed to grow into her own skin and find out just what a talented, beautiful young woman she is.

And she did it in spite of all the times we tormented her when we were kids. I'll be honest, I wasn't always very nice to my only little sister. I'm not proud of it. Brian and I often tormented or provoked her (and often got in trouble for it) when she was little. But she's grown up in spite of it, and as she reaches maturity, the age-gap between us feels so much smaller. It's taken a long time, but these days, when I talk to her on the phone and spend time with her when I'm at home, I catch wonderful glimpses of the kind of friends we're becoming.

As a teen, I knew that my sister and I didn't get along. She drove me crazy, but I always knew at the back of my mind that it wouldn't be that way forever. One day, we would both be adults, and the friendship we always knew we should have would grow and blossom. I'm so grateful that it's reaching that point. I've never liked being at odds with my little sister. Happy Birthday, Jessa. Even if it is one day late, I still love you.

And I will write Brian a letter this week. Time to get back to being a good big sister. :)

Michelle

So that better choice I mentioned yesterday? Just got better today. I went to crash my brother's ward's break-the-fast because Stephanie and I were hungry and Michelle's birthday dinner was planned for later. Brian's friend (the flirtatious one) was there, naturally, and we talked for a little while. Then, later on, he caught me by myself and said, "Hey, I have a question." When I responded curiously, he said, "Can I take you to lunch sometime this week?" followed closely by, "Can I have your number so that I can call you for lunch sometime this week?"

Wow. Brownie points to the man for being straightforward. Considering his already-existent appeal based on the fact that he was easy to talk to, he definitely got a yes. :) And my weekend got even better.

But... on to the main point of my entry today:

TODAY IS MICHELLE'S BIRTHDAY! And, to borrow a rather clever quote from a girl in my ward, she's turning 19 for the... well, unstated number of times in a row. If she wishes to reveal her age, that's up to her.  I won't do it for her. But that's beside the point. As we all know, age is just a number, and Michelle exactly as old or young as she should be. I love her for it, and I often forget that she's a different age from me at all.

So, to celebrate the anniversary of Michelle's birth, Savannah cooked a fabulous dinner that we ate as roommates (joined by Kunkee, who is as much a part of our closest circle as any of our roommates are). Part of me hated Savannah for her cooking, because I couldn't help but eat more of it than my body would have liked. It was worth the stuffed-to-the-brim feeling, though. :)

I'm so glad that I have Michelle as a roommate. She's been a huge example and a wonderful sister. So many people have told me that they found their best friends in high school or in their freshman year of college, but for me, I found all my true friends a little later than that (aside from Qait, who's been my sister for 7 years now). But believe me, it was worth the extra wait. There are times that I think about moving away and changing things up, but honestly, I couldn't bear the thought of facing everyday life without them. It's a support system that I know I can rely on, no matter what happens.

Outside of my parents, who are the most steady, loving, solid support I could ever ask for, my roommates are my lifeline. And Michelle and her faith, testimony, love, and crazy-but-contagious-laugh is a huge part of that. So thank you, Michelle, for being my sister. I love you.

Halfsies

It's my half-birthday today. I'm feeling a bit old. And yet, way too young at the same time. Welcome to my life of conflicting emotions. :)

And yes, I do actually keep track of my half-birthday. I even have a party planned. If by party you mean catching up on the four episodes of Chuck that I still haven't watched. That's my glamorous half-birthday celebration.

Happy Birthday, Hyrum!

It's my baby brother's birthday today. He's 12 now. Which, for those of you who remember him as this chunky little troublemaking toddler, is probably as disconcerting to think about as it is for me. I have fond memories of him roaming around us during family prayer, bumping into us, knocking us in the back with plastic hammers, and trailing around little silky girls clothes. Perhaps I should not share some of these things with the cyberworld. He might not appreciate it. But it'll be a story told at his wedding and to his children someday, so he might as well get used to it. He used to carry around this pink, silky, girls dress that we used on one of our dolls. I think he liked the feel of it. Anyway, we noticed that he was pretty much glued to this little dress, so my mom thought it would be funny to put it on him and see what he did.

It was a struggle to get it out of his hands long enough to get him into it, but we succeeded. And I have to say, I'm quite proud of my little brother. As soon as it was on him, he looked down at it with an expression of deep disgust (well, as deeply disgusted as a toddler can ever be) and started picking at it and squirming desperately to get out of it. Because it was a dress. He might have liked touching it, but that didn't mean he wanted to wear it. My mom beamed at her little man. We've never doubted his boy-ness since.

Brian, on the other hand... ;-) (laugh if you want, but I have a very authentic picture of Brian, two years old, wearing a pair of plastic high heels... I'm saving it for blackmail purposes. I'm sure his wife and I will have some fun together in years to come)

Anyway, so Hyrum's getting the priesthood this week. It's a little sobering to realize how old my baby brother is getting. He's turning into a young man, and I'm a little sad that I have to miss it because I'm already gone. I like being a part of my siblings' growth and progression to maturity, but the simple fact is that we grow best when we have room to grow. Brian changed a lot when he wasn't in the shadow of his older sister, and Jessa is really starting to reach her stride now that both of her older siblings are gone. Hyrum's doing the same. I can't wait to see what happens as we all grow up.

21 Things I Loved about Turning 21

My birthday was pretty much awesome. I was really quite ambivalent going into it, because my birthdays have a history of either requiring extensive planning by me (something I've gotten tired of doing) or purely uneventful. As in, "Oh, yesterday was my birthday... cool."

So I had mixed feelings about my upcoming birthday celebrations. I'm ego-centric enough that I want people to recognize that it's my special day, but I'm not narcissistic enough to advertise it so that people can't miss the fact that I'm turning a year older. Pretty much everyone knew about it yesterday, but that was thanks to Facebook and the publicity from my friends. Which is the best way to get attention on your birthday, I think. Anyway, I thought I'd compile a list of things that I loved about my birthday as a way of thanking my friends for making it the best birthday I've had since my 16th.

The Once and Future Present

Well, it's my birthday today. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but it's kind of a big deal. After all, no one reading this blog would be reading it if I weren't here, so anyone who likes me and my writing should be pretty darn happy on June 2nd, since it's the day we celebrate Lynnae entering this world.

But I thought it appropriate to take stock and see how the 21-year-old, fully adult Lynnae stacks up against her expectations of where she'd be at this point. By the way, I think it's slightly humorous that you're considered a full-fledged adult at age 21 when you still have to pay mondo fees to rent a car until you're 25, you don't qualify for Pell grants until the year you turn 24 (or if you're married, but that's irrelevant to me at the moment), and everyone I meet still goes, "DANG you're young!" Riiiight. Adulthood. It seems like we've still got a couple of years to go before Adulthood and I truly become well-acquainted with each other.

Oh, and let's not forget the fact that my older friends and family still act younger than me sometimes most of the time. So really, adulthood doesn't count for much. It just means people ask fewer questions when you want something and they assume that you know what you're talking about. On the flip side, you get away with a lot less foolishness than you did when you were a kid. Because, again, people assume that you know what you're doing. Or that you should. And if you don't, you failed at something along the way. Which is probably true.

Anyway. A brief peek into the then-and-now Lynnaes.

THEN: Lynnae wanted to publish a book before she graduated high school, and be the next Christopher Paolini.
NOW: Well first up, I don't much care for Christopher Paolini. He's somewhat juvenile in his storytelling style and it grates on me. I want to red-pen him every time I read one of his books. Which is saying something, since I'm a pretty mellow editor. Which brings us to the whole author thing... yeah. It didn't happen. I had book well in the works, but I took a hiatus, came back, didn't like the story anymore because I'd learned how to actually write in that hiatus and scrapped the story. I then proceeded to discover that editing was much more fun for me than writing. So I'll be editing for the next Christopher Paolini instead of becoming him. And for the record, my protege (yes I know there's supposed to be an accent mark... stupid HTML doesn't like me) will be a very good writer. Not a hack who shamelessly steals from Lord of the Rings and Star Wars. What? I really don't hate Christopher Paolini. Honest! Oh wait... nevermind. I should probably tell the truth and increase my chances of living to my next birthday.

THEN: Lynnae-that-was had a secret plan to be married by the time she was 21. Sure, she could wait until she graduated, but where's the fun in that? Somehow, 21 just seemed like the perfect age.
NOW: Frankly, I no longer care when I get married. All I know is that I'm not married yet, and I haven't minded the wait all that much. I have more to do than I could ever get done, and most of my plans are flexible enough to handle anything that life throws at me. Of course, now that I've said that, Murphy's Law dictates that I will be proven conclusively wrong. Please be kind and rescue me from my own hubris, if it comes to that, okay?

THEN: Lynnae planned on going to BYU and majoring in English
NOW: Fortunately for me, that's exactly what happened, and I'm so glad it did.

THEN: In high school, Lynnae was actually kind of arrogant. She was convinced that she was going make a splash in the giant pond of BYU and prove to the world how smart she was. She'd learned a ton, and was ready to show everyone what she'd learned.
NOW: It didn't take long for me to learn humility. I burned out winter semester of my freshman year and my grades dropped enough to lose me the scholarship I'd won. That's when I learned that there's so much more to learn. I also learned that grades aren't really all that important in the long run. Yeah, they show people how smart you are, but I've since formed the opinion that if you have to flaunt your grades to prove your intelligence, you've still got a long way to go. Because the smartest people 1) don't need to show off and 2) understand that there's really no such thing as a smart person. Everyone in humanity is equally moronic at times. Conversely, we all have our moments of genius too.

There are still plenty of things for me to work on, and I'm really not all that mature. Remember, Adulthood and I are still kind of treading cautiously around each other. But suffice to say, I like where I'm going and I'm happy with where I've been. Bring on the new year.